The Show Must Go On

Over the course of Sue’s illness, I did a lot of reading and research. A LOT of reading and research.
Trying to find something… anything … that might help her.
I will post some of the information – in the hope it might help someone you know.
In the meantime – please go to Lynda’s blog and watch this video. It will take about an hour. I hope it will change your life.
achangeoflife.blogspot.co.nz

Look for Cereal Killers – the post Lynda wrote on Monday June 30

I can’t remember how to do the link thing, sorry, but please go there. This is all tied up with what I discovered about a ketogenic diet and its effect on cancer.

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Here we go again…

Sue goes into hospital tomorrow.
She has been in terrible pain. Morphine doesn’t help.
It feels like a band is hard around gopher stomach.
She has been virtually unable to eat – 2 teaspoons of rice and half a cup of broth is a huge meal.
She was losing weight at the rate of half a kilo a day.
That stopped, swelling in her gut started and the pain got much worse.
Tomorrow they will operate to try and ‘suck out the goop’ from her gut, in an effort to relieve the pressure and give her some quality of life.
It turns out that the Hospice doctors are far more pro-active in terms of on going treatment than the oncologist was.
We met her surgeon on Friday – he is a long, tall, geeky-nerdy chap whom I would follow to the ends of the Earth. He is immensely kind and optimistic.
He loves these types of cases – as does her Hospice doctor.
They have been wonderful, but we are frightened of her having to spend time at the hospital as she will be back in the ward she had such mixed treatment from back at the beginning of all this.
Of course, this time around we are much more aware of the need to advocate for her. And I will. Quietly, but very firmly if necessary.
She is very, very unwell.
And yet determined to fight.
I have been cleaning like a demon. It doesn’t help her, but it gives me something to do and passes the time.
On another note:
I have been completely unable to comment on your blogs. I try, and the interwebs swallow my comment whole. Please know that I check in with you each day and long to be in touch. You are very important to me and have kept me sane throughout this thing.
Thank you XO

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Graduation Day

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Rainbow Bridge

My Poppy died today.

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Poppy

Poppy is missing.
She was unwell for a couple of days. We took her to the vet on Friday.
She hardly ate a thing yesterday.
She wouldn’t come in last night – which is not unusual for her.
Today she is gone.
We have been around the neighbourhood calling her.
She came when I called (quietly, just after midnight) – was friendly, but still would not eat.
We haven’t seen her since.
We are hoping she has gone to ground till she feels better, but realistically we think she has gone away to die.
We have cancelled our New Year break. Neither of us can bear to be away just now.
If you have time and could spare a wee prayer (or whatever comes closest) it would be very much appreciated.
Thank you. XO

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Update

I must apologise.
It’s been so long since I posted, and you have been so supportive over the last year. I owe you an update.

Sue has been having some very severe side-effects. Side-effects are to be expected, of course but these have worried her oncologist in their severity.
She was hospitalised overnight recently because she had diarrhoea that wouldn’t stop. Diarrhoea causes dehydration. They did control it eventually and gave her a week ‘off’ chemo, to give her a rest and help her recover.
The change in her was amazing. She was just so much better. Chemotherapy – as it turns out – is poison
Her next chemo is tomorrow, and another next week. That will be the end of this cycle of chemo. She will then have a CT scan to see if there has been any lessening of her cancer.
Depending on the result of that, the oncologist will make a plan for the future.
She has plans of her own.
She has completed her study and depending on the result of her last assignment, will graduate in March and is DETERMINED to walk across the stage unaided.
Before that, there is Christmas of course; we have a annual extended family picnic, and our dad’s 80th birthday at the beginning of February.
Her son, Ben, will turn 21 at the end of November next year. She wants to be there.
If attitude makes any difference at all to outcome, she will outlive us all.

We’ve had an up and down year here. Rick had an ‘issue’ at work that could have ended in disaster. It didn’t. But the stress levels amped up enormously. It is resolved, but I am still on sleeping pills. I hate them, but I simply cannot sleep at the moment.
Our Percy had more issues with his waterworks and had to have an operation. He now pees like a girl (don’t tell him!), but he will not have a blockage problem again… and really, we do not NEED an overseas holiday – lol
Poppy is firing on all cylinders, no sign yet of a return of her allergies. I am still making a raw food mixture for them, and they are all enjoying it – though Pops is making it her mission to rid the world of mice and is bringing home at least one a day. She tortures them outside and usually eats them all up… good roughage which she has not yet barfed up on the carpet… Phew!
Yoshi is doing well, but will be much, much happier once the fireworks season is over. He has been very distressed this year, and because the fireworks go on for days… and all hours (the latest were let off just before 5 this morning) it is impossible to medicate him. University exams finish soon, then the kids will go home and leave the city in peace for a few months. Can’t wait!
Other People’s Children make me LONG for a cabin in the wilderness – surrounded by a moat… and a drawbridge… and gunships (or sharks) …
I am getting very grumpy in my old age. And it is my birthday today 🙂 – more birthdays, more grumpiness lol.
On a house-keeping note (if you are still reading), I am having trouble commenting on some of your blogs. Some of you have an anti-spam code thing that I need to complete before you can get my comment. I have figured out that autocorrect changes the codes… humph! Please be assured I am still checking up on you.
You help me get through the day.
Love you lots
Janet XO

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Lemon Dust

I waste far too much time lately, sitting – little old cat on my knee – scrolling through all the pretties on Pinterest.
I even find some interesting recipes – including this one.
Sue has a huge, and hugely prolific lemon tree. I have been using her lemons to make fruit jellies for her. Gelatine is very good for you if you have diarrhoea – which is a side-effect of this chemo…

The juice is great, but I remembered a pin I found which suggested dehydrating then grinding the zest for use as a condiment.
It is really easy to do – produces a powder that looks for all the world like gold dust – and, with its gentle – almost caramelised lemon flavour – is just as good dusted over fish, as over a dessert.
I’ve also used it dusted over roast chicken.

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Pear and Pecan Cake with Caramel Sauce

Ray McVinnie

3/4 cup rice flour
1 cup gluten free corn flour
1 1/2 cups caster sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp gluten free baking powder
1 tbsp ground cinnamon
1 tbsp ground ginger
1 cup pecan nuts, coarsely chopped
3/4 cup mildly flavoured vegetable oil
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
3 very firm pears, peeled, cored and diced 1cm

Preheat oven to 175
Butter a 23cm loose-bottomed cake tin and line the base with baking paper
Place the dry ingredients, including the nuts, in a large bowl and mix well
In a smaller bowl whisk together eggs, oil and vanilla
Add pears, mix well, then pour onto the dry ingredients and mix well
Pour the mixture into the cake tin
Bake till a skewer comes out clean – 45 to 50 minutes
If the top browns too quickly, cover loosely with foil
Remove from oven and cool completely
Serve with the following sauce poured over. Serves 8

Caramel Sauce
1/2 cup caster sugar
1/4 cup water
300ml cream

Put sugar and water into a saucepan and heat over medium heat
Stir until sugar is dissolved and the mixture boils
Boil until it starts to turn golden brown – swirl pan – do not stir
Take pan off heat and carefully add the cream. It will spit!
When the bubbling has died down, return pan to heat and stir until lumps of caramel have dissolved.
Remove from heat and cool

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